Only Love Can Hurt Like This
by Rumbuss
Summary: (Jack/Angelica) - Set Before COTBP - One Shot - "She would lay peacefully until she woke to find him gone, with the thought that everything was a lie, and that he never loved her despite it being all untrue. While Jack would forever be stuck with the thought that he left her for a ship".


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**Note: Set after events of young Captain Jack Sparrow's ship (the Wicked Wench) being set alight and sinking as punishment, ordered by Cutler Beckett, after liberating slaves, Becket formally names as 'cargo'. (This is discussed in 'At Worlds End'). Angelica is present for all the events above. This is BEFORE Jack was branded a pirate, and strikes a deal with Davy Jones to rase his ship again, thus naming is formally the 'Black Pearl'. This happens after the events bellow. Ages: Angelica (21) Jack (24)**

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**Please enjoy this one shot, based on the lyrics from Paloma Faith's song, 'Only love can hurt like this', depicting how Jack first left Angelica all those years ago.**

**-Rum**

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**~ Only Love Can Hurt Like This ~**

**\- Paloma Faith**

Gone.

Jack rubbed his forehead, fingers pushing under his bandanna. In matter of moments, in a mater of sudden flames, the Wench was gone. Sails ablaze, sinking down into the bottomless ocean, charing the hull deep black. He had felt his pride sink and joy with it, as he sat in a long boat, soaked, watching it fall with out a fight.

His fingers pushed off his bandanna, falling into his hat that was thrown onto the table next to him. He could still see that red fire in the night behind his eye lids, burning above the water fiercer than he had ever seen. Jacks mind couldn't comprehend it. For the good deed he did, God repaired him with pain.

Returning his hands to his forehead he opened his eyes, looking down at his boots and the wooden floor around them. Good things come with a cost.

Two soft hands placed themselves on his cheeks. They lifted up his chin so his eyes faced forward. Angelica knelt on the floor in front of where Jack sat on his chair. Her hair slightly still wet, was beginning to curl back to how it normally fell. Her skin dewy as it always was and her eyes cameral as ever, the candle light making her bare shoulders bronzer.

_I tell myself you don't mean a thing,_

_And what we got, got no hold on me._

She smiled making the corner of jacks lips curl as well. Angelica leaned in pecking his lips. "You did the right thing.". She whispered over his lips making the smile from his beam. "With a lot of input from you darling.". Jack spoke back as she stood up, chuckling deeply as she went. His eyes followed her as she made her way to the bed tiredly. She collapsed onto the bed stretching out her arms yawning.

Where the deviation had occurred, a port wasn't far away. Whoever was left, helped row to shore causing a tavern to be their cheap accommodation for the night.

He continued to watch her stretch on the bed, his fingers running over the lace around his wrist. She kicked off her boots causing them to fall to the floor. Equal time had he known both his ship and Angelica. But five years spent with one, seemed sweeter.

She was gorgeous for sure, nothing had he seen in his early years could compare to her, beauty and strength. Jack frowned, he couldn't part the thoughts of Angelica, from his lost ship. He quickly rubbed his face confused with his own mind.

Jacks eyes returned back to Angelica, as she lay leaning off the side of the bed looking back at him. He couldn't bare parting with either.

_But when you're not there, I just, crumble._

She smiled sweetly, before rolling onto her back. He bit his lips. Jack knew what he should love more. He stood up, taking of his coat placing it behind him to the table still in thought. What he had loved more. He shouldn't favor what he did, he knew it was wrong.

_I tell myself, I don't care that much,_

But he couldn't help it. If only she heard his thoughts. After pulling off his waist coat, he made his way to the bed, where he should want to be. Jack climbed over Angelica plonking himself down next to her, rolling herself onto him. Her fingers moved inside his shirt as she slowly moved herself on top. She sat on top of him, looking down.

Angelica frowned, as he could feel her eyes searching through his. "We can get another ship...". She pushed her hands further into his shirt making him smile as she whispered her words.

Her hands, softer than he could handle, let alone the rest of her skin. His heart began to beat again only for her. Jack sat up so she sat in his lap, legs either side of his abdomen, Angelica now higher than him. With his hands holding her sides, he nuzzled into her neck lovingly. He could never get enough of her, his hunger and lust for Angelica un fillable.

_But I feel like I die, 'til I feel your touch,_

Still, the lingering feeling of his other, lost, in the back of his mind, made him feel as if he was cheating. He squinted his eyes shut trying to enjoy her closeness as she wrapped her arms around him giggling. Her hands moved back down to the skin on his chest, still with their heads cuddling in each other necks. That feeling of her touch always felt so good. But the over shadowing want for what was gone ached in the back of his heart.

_Only love, only love can hurt like this,_

She began to kiss his cheek, as Jack did the same until their lips met. A slow innocent kiss turned into a battle as both had thoughts of more. Her hands grabbed his skin as her nails ran down hard over his muscles. Both breathed in heavily, wanting each other.

_Only love can hurt like this._

Angelica hands lifted up over his shoulders lifting his shirt up, it falling down to around his waist, still with his hands in the sleeves. Jacks hands grabbed her tight as one moved its self up to her cheek kissing back passionately. The intense feeling of sexual love over powered all others, just a kiss could change his mind for the better, the tightness bellow adding to the want.

_Must have been a deadly kiss._

Jack heard a soft moan from Angelica escape their kiss as Jack moved his hands up into her shirt. He felt her soft skin underneath with flat hands, taking his time to feel every inch of her back, lifting up her shirt as he went running his fingers over his curves.

_Only love can hurt like this,_

Jack stopped once he reached her shoulders, moving his fingers to her front. He moaned himself feeling her lips smile on his. It began. Everything picked up and the pace quickened. She pushed him down as he moved his hands down her legs that lay straddling him.

But even with all this, it was still there.

_Say I wouldn't care if you walked away,_

Jack felt the tightness bellow become stronger, unbearably stronger. She was too much for him to love. Too much good, too much perfection to what he deserved, especially with what he thought, even now.

Their lips parted as she moved hers to his cheek. Jack smiled with his eyes closed, feeling himself go pink wherever she kissed. Angelica's hands moved down to his shirt unbuttoning that one stubborn button that was keeping it on. Once gone, his pant buttons were next, just knowing what lie under made him smile, made him want more.

_But every time you're there, I'm begging you to stay,_

All buttons gone, her hands roamed low. Jack squinted his eyes shut grunting with pleasure as he suddenly rolled over, needing more. He forced their lips together again pushing her down.

She wrapped her arms around his neck as he placed himself on top, hands lifting up her shirt, eager to rip it off. All of her was his, his to have. She had given herself to him, out of love and naivety. And he in turn, had promised his loyalty to her, and all of him, to her.

But his loyalty was in vain, his mind still thinking of another despite what he felt for her, and her undivided love that she gave only to him. These thoughts butted out the ones of the other, they made him smile, his heart began to beat stronger for her.

Her bust under his hands, the more he wanted. Her shirt fell to the floor, as her feet pushed his pants further down to his knees. He shuddered at what he wanted next, he needed it, he needed it more than for just pleasures sake.

_When you come close, I just tremble_

Jacks hands quickly moved down to her own pants, fumbling for the buttons as it was all becoming too much. The passion he felt tensioned every muscle in his body. He pushed himself down onto her embracingly, breaking the kiss to feel closer to her. But yet it was still there, making him want to show his mind that he loved her more.

_And every time, every time you go,_

_It's like a knife that cuts right through my soul._

He shook as he pulled them off, keeping his lips to the skin on her neck. Jack waited for Angelica to let him, then she finally did.

_Only love, only love can hurt like this_

Both moaned as the build up to this moment seemed to last for an eternity. He felt her nails dig into his skin as she hugged tighter. He kept his squinted eyes in her neck kissing her skin as he wanted to be as close as he could to her, trying to show himself what he really loved.

Angelica was so warm, both inside and out. His hands tingled as one shifted to her lower back, the other at her hip. It almost hurt at how much he loved this, loved her, and how she chose him, of all people to be with, even when his thoughts still made him think of another.

_Only love can hurt like this,_

He ripped his lips away from her neck as punishment for the thoughts at such a time. But Angelica moved hers placing them onto his as soon as he did. Jack could feel in her kiss she wanted more with the fierceness, so he gave it to her, their lips parting. She began to kiss his neck, adding to the sparks of lust he felt below.

_Your kisses burn into my skin,_

Jack pushed against her as everything sped up again. It was a blur of pleasure as both tried. Neither could get enough, whatever they did didn't seem to cut it, so they tried harder, but still not enough. Angelica's nails continued to dig into his skin, it was such pain that she caused him seemed to make it feel even better.

_But it's the sweetest pain,_

The air between them was hot and thick. Everything blurring as they just wanted to reach the end, but yet wanted it to last forever. Jack bit down hard, feeling her fingers run through his dreadlocks, moving her kisses to his cheek.

_Burning hot through my veins,_

Jack could feel how close he was, how close she was. They were using all their strength to hold onto each other until the end. It was torture at how close he was, at how close they both were. Just so close to the finish, although it seemed to far. Angelica moaned against his lips as Jack did the same.

_Love is torture makes me more sure,_

It happened.

They both hung their mouth open over each other, leaning his forehead on hers. Silence stayed between them as all Jack could here was his heart beating in his ears. He pushed down onto her hips, Angelica grabbing around his neck, until it finished.

...Only love can hurt like this.

Jacks arms failed him as he lay on top of her, hands holding his sides. Angelica's hand sat on his arm wrapped around her body as the other lay on his back. He breathed heavily in sync with her, their sweat almost radiating off them. His head rested in the crook of her neck, eyes shut breathing.

He waited for everything to calm, then rolled over taking Angelica with him. Jack moved onto his back, with Angelica now cuddled into his chest. With hands resting on her curves he kept his eyes shut, still trying to catch his breath.

Nothing happened for moments, until her body disappeared from his. He opened his eyes wondering where she went when she returned with the sheet. She pulled it over them moving up to give him a long, passionate kiss, hands cupping his face.

"I love you...". She mumbled against his lips leaning weakly on him. Jack stopped as he felt the love for the other explode in him.

_Only love can hurt like this._

"I... I love you too angel...". Jack said in a whisper finally, unable to open his eyes to look at her, ashamed at the love he felt burning for another, when he wanted it for her. He didn't deserve her love.

Angelica kissed him again with a smile on her lips, making the pain of confusion he felt, ache. She moved back down cuddling into his neck, wrapping her arms around his chest, her kiss still felt on his lips.

_Your kisses burn into my skin._

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Jack woke suddenly, eyes opening to a darkened room. He twisted his head looking around, until the feeling of her in his arm told him where he was. His eyes moved to Angelica who lay asleep.

He moved one hand off from around her to rub his face. Everything seemed okay, until it came back. The longing was back. He looked back at Angelica, but it wasn't for her. He kept staring still confused. After it all, after all the passion, he still felt it, for an object.

_Only love can hurt like this.  
_

He couldn't understand. Jack looked back up at the ceiling trying to comprehend, then back down to Angelica. The love was there, but, smothered by another more momentarily stronger. How could this be after the things he said and promised her, all the things she promised him.

She stirred in his arms, running a hand down his chest, and slowly over to his arm. Angelica's fingers ran down his arm, and over the lace she had given him years ago, and to his hand, holding it weakly.

Jack squinted his eyes shut in pain at the love he felt. The love for her was sill there, but right now, not as strong as the love her felt for what he lost.

_Only love can hurt like this,_

He couldn't do this, to her, and to himself. He couldn't stay knowing he lusted for another. He couldn't fall for an object without a heart, when the one he was leaving, had dedicated hers, to him.

But it kept calling, it kept calling for him to find her. He knew she wasn't lost forever, there had to be a way, there always is.

Jack sat up slowly, still feeling half his heart trying to pull him down, as the other yanked him up. He carefully shifted his legs out from under hers, slipping off the bed but Jack stopped. Angelica's hand was still intertwined with his, her fingers, and the ring he had given her, gripping onto him tightly.

_Save me, save me,_

He waited for the half of his heart dedicated to her, to over power and give him a reason to stop, but it didn't. He carefully, as much as it hurt, unhooked her fingers from his, moving away.

Jack dressed, keeping his eyes over her sleeping body trying to push his heart to change as much as he could, but all it did was make the pain worse. It wasn't regular pain, but heartbreaking pain. Such pain that he knew he'd cause her when she woke. He shook his head, moving away utterly disgusted with himself.

He continued to dress, until all that was left was his hat. His eyes scanned the table that lay in front of him, now only holding her faith embedded necklace. Jack turned around clasping his hat nervously. Jack approached the bed, kneeling down to her.

He just sat there for a while looking at what he would was hurting. After all the devotion, care and pure love she gave to him, he in turn gave her pain. Jack frowned, leaning in pressing her lips to his forehead.

_Only love, only love,_

"I love you...". He whispered as quiet as he could to her skin, this time meaning it for her.

_'Cause only love can hurt like this_

Jack stood placing his hat shamefully upon his head. He would never forgive himself for this, never forgive himself for choosing a ship over Angelica. Once making his way to the door, he quietly turned the handle trying his best to not wake her. A dim light shone from outside and a low strum of music followed.

Before Jack stepped outside, he looked back. She would lay peacefully until she woke to find him gone, with the thought that everything was a lie, and that he never loved her despite it being all untrue.

While Jack would forever be stuck with the thought that he left her for a ship. Jack frowned with sorrow looking away shutting the door silently behind him.

_And it must have been a deadly kiss._

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_**Hope you enjoyed! Remember to Favorite to tell me you like it, and to Review to give my your thoughts on this one shot and how well you think this song fits. I really think this song fits Jack &amp; Angelica's WHOLE relationship in a nut shell! Anyway, Have a great day!**_

_**-Rum xxoo**_


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